I have a few things to say...

I feel like blogging… yet I don’t.

I want to tell you about what I am feeling, what I have seen and what I have done. But I cannot.

I am sitting at Odd Cafe in Greenside listening to and watching the noisy, excited and colourful bunch that are streaming in with their Amazing Race clues. Glugging back Lovoka shots.

I am listening to Armand Van Helden – King of My Castle and loving it. This track brings back so many memories for me living in Zim all those years back.

I have a Vaseline tub that is on its last dregs that I have had since I was in Matric. This tub has gone everywhere with me for the last 7 years, to the beach, to sports, to work, to my exams and much to a lot of my friends disgust has even been whipped out in the middle of the dance floor at clubs for that much needed moisture for the pout.

I love kissing.

I am now listening to Art Company – Suzanna. Where did I get this song from?

I have been living in Jo’burg for about 4 years now, such a beautiful dynamic city. I love it here, and cannot imagine living anywhere else.

I feel lonely. No I don’t. Whatever.

I have CharlieC, he is gorgeous. Such a treasure. Today after gym he fell asleep in my arms. 10 minutes later he was biting my hand; this apparently is how he shows me his love? I like biting too

I love the Asaf Avidan – One Day Reckoning Song (Wankelmut Remix). Possibly my song of the year. Or not. I fall in love with new music every day. I have heard some amazing music this year, and all with such a contrast. I have an obsession, I cannot stop buying CDs. Rock, Pop, Indie, French Cafe, Electronic, House… still struggling to get my head around Heavy Metal though. We’ll see.

I watched Breaking Dawn Part 2 twice this week. Average, yip I said it, sorry Twilight babies. Read the books, they’re more exciting and you don’t have to put up with Kristen Stewart’s terrible pretending.

I am currently reading Fifty Shades Darker, 2^nd book of the Fifty Shades Trilogy. What a load of trash. Badly written, boring as hell book I have ever read.

I was supposed to do the Sisters with Blisters walk today but instead I lay in bed listening to the rain. Yip I feel guilty. Oops.

I cannot wait for the 16^th December, yay for a three week holiday at the Wild Coast! Not so yay for distance of a certain kind.

I have a feeling.

I feel uncertain.

I am struggling to start more sentences with I… haha, not even sure what the hell I was trying to do by doing it. I remember someone told me once that starting with ‘I’ in more than one sentence in an email, letter, essay etc is rude/self absorbed?

I… I…

I cannot remember what it feels like anymore.

I think someone in a black & white prison costume just walked past me. These Amazing Race teams are dressed as everything. Although I haven’t seen any naughty nurses.I have a pair of red & white nurse stockings in the back of my cupboard somewhere… Random.

I recently started running, when I say running I actually mean that I have done two 10km runs, I have run for like 15 minutes at a time on the treadmill, down Conrad Road and up Jan Smuts (that is a 4km run!) I am loving it, there are no other words. I feel so free when I am running. I did the Nike Run Jozi 10km in about 1hr40mins and then the Soweto 10km in 1hr14mins59sec I beat my 1^st time! Chuffed!

I actually feel free when I am doing any sort of exercise. I always used to say I would never join a gym because you look like a lab rat in the gym, but really it isn’t that bad. I wasn’t the sportiest person in school. Junior school sure, tennis, rounders, athletics, hockey, swimming… you name it, I did it. High School, all I did was play squash and I loved it. League, provincial and just for fun. Now I don’t play it at all. Sad really. I always managed to make it into the inter-schools gala in High School, and much to my disgust I had to stand in front of everyone in my swimming costume with shaking legs before I had swim across a never ending length of a damn cold Olympic size swimming pool!

I was sick enough to after 5 years purchase myself a swimming costume again, with the intention of swimming at the gym. I have used it twice and usually I pass out after swimming because the chlorine is like taking Tequila to the eye ball.

I have ATB – Don’t Stop on repeat *happy place* this song will never die.

I just had a guy tell me that he is 50 Shades of Grey at Odd Cafe. Shuwee these Amazing Race boys are feisty! I’ll show him 50 Shades of Grey haha

I did the 94.7 Cycle Challenge on the 18^th November for the 1^st time. I feel like this was a huge achievement, I really did not think it would be so difficult but I did it and I finished it… in 5hrs5mins. Yip, I remember I was originally aiming for 4hrs! Haha.

I laugh thinking back to the race now, I remember towards the last 30km’s of the race saying to my Dad that I could not go on, I was hurting, my back was sore, my left shoulder was on fire, my hands were getting sore because I wasn’t wearing gloves, my neck was aching, my thighs were on fire (on fire is an understatement) they were f**king burning like nothing I have ever felt before!  LOL. We’re cycling up a hill (possibly the thousandth hill that day), I’m like “Dad, I can’t. How much further? How many more hills?”. He points to the right (to ANOTHER hill full of cyclists) and says, “look over there, that is the last longest hill left, then there are a few small ones and we’re done”. Needless to say I wiped a few tears away from my cheeks and I pushed on! LOL, yip I had a moment of proper weakness.

I can say that, on the day of the 94.7 it was the 1^st time I got on the bike (I had only prepared for the race in spinning classes) and it was a mountain bike not a road bike. I did not once get off my bike to push it up a hill like many others that I passed along the way.

I have ticked that off the bucket list and might be cray cray enough to do it again in the future. I still need to do the Comrades, Argus & Midmar Mile. All of these at least once in my lifetime

I am getting an iPhone, soooo excited. I used to love my Blackberry, really I did but lately it has just been constantly freezing and the quality of the phone is just plain crap.

I am going to Thailand next year, I have never been overseas before. Should be interesting, I am going to a foreign country alone and on a Contiki Tour. Hahaha *nervous giggle* should be entertaining and FUN!

I need coffee.

I have been thinking about my career a lot lately. A year ago I was all, get to the top, be the best, do it quickly, do it better and do it alone. Now I feel like there is so much more to life. Yes I know that a career is important but there are other things more to life. I have found a balance and I am loving it for now. Work is fun and it is not going away anytime soon!

I can smell this darn Lovoka. Yeck.

I have one of my most favourite songs on now, The Beatles – Here Comes the Sun.

I cannot believe how many cute boys are taking part in the Amazing Race (yes I said boys) because they all look so young. Well too young for me that is. Haha.

I was supposed to be sitting here today and cleaning up all the shite music off my iTunes. Meh, that didn’t happen!

I ‘quit’ drinking the last 3 weeks, 1^st Nov – 23^rd Nov, I didn’t drink any alcohol. It was supposed to be for the whole of Nov but I figured I did well not drinking for 3 weeks so last night I had a much needed glass of wine October was a bit of a gross one. I got totally smashed the one night and came short of trashing my name! Not a good look for anyone.

I think that is enough for one day. Considering I didn’t feel like blogging earlier I had quite a lot to say

I still have a feeling though.

Love, love me do, you know I love you! – The Beatles. Classic!

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